I was not supposed to post two blog entries in a day but this is something that I just needed to get off my mind.
I’m writing this because the current situation of our health care system is alarming and for my fellow countrymen in the Philippines if this distress call from our modern heroes doesn’t worry you— it should.
Okay, this is sad and alarming. This made me more scared because our health care system is our armor during this pandemic and now that they are close to giving up, it’s like the hope for fighting and ending this virus is far from being achieved. It also made me more angry to the government, and for all the time that they wasted on other irrelevant issues during this crisis. Like, passing anti-terror law which violates the constitution and rights of Filipinos. They also focused more on the franchise renewal of one of the country’s largest TV network. Imagine if they focused more on the actual biggest problem here which is COVID-19 and not them creating laws to stop criticisms towards the government or using political power to get revenge. Now, the country cannot afford another lockdown. I am so furious because we had gone through that lockdown for almost 3 months and the government didn’t do anything at that time to find a solution. Like, mass testing and contact tracing, instead they used that time to make a move on their political agenda which is to make the current administration more in control and powerful. What also makes me furious with the country’s current situation is that a lot of my fellow countrymen are not furious as I am. They still support what this failing administration is doing, even if they are being fooled right in their face, they still turn a blind eye and just support the president. They are not a Filipino, they are fans. They idolized this current president that they are becoming ignorant to the country’s situation.
Now, our doctors and nurses are exhausted because the government didn’t prioritize the solution to the biggest problem that the country is facing. What will happen to us? I don’t know but I pray that we all get through this together.
I am praying for all the medical frontliners, give them strength and patience to face this pandemic. I am praying for their safety.
To all the frontliners around the world. We are all thankful for what you are doing for your country, you are indeed our modern heroes.
Well this was too soon to what I said from my last post that I’m not going to be here that much anymore but I had the time and words, I just need to spill some thoughts out. Here’s me opening up more about what I think about the stuff people say to me and about me.
I’ve always been labeled as the quiet one, sometimes crabby because of my resting bitch face but most of the time I’m the “quiet one”.
I’ve been putting off writing for a while now, and I really wanted to write like I used to but I don’t want it to feel like it was forced. The truth is I feel like I’m done with this whole writing thing but let me explain.
As you all know if you have been a follower of this blog for almost 5 years, I started this out of boredom and venting, in short I was lonely. I started this as a way for me to release thoughts and emotions, to eventually understand myself as it goes, and to find something that I felt was missing. It worked out really well and I am proud of how this blog turned out and how I grew as a person and as a “writer/blogger”. I have met some pretty cool people here and I learned from what I read in here. From almost 5 years of writing I kinda feel like I’m done and I somehow achieved my goal for myself. I am not lonely anymore, I somehow finally accept my life and how shitty it can get and I don’t feel incomplete anymore. What I’m saying here is I don’t write quite often like I did before because I don’t feel like I need to, I am in a whole lot different place now than I was in 5 years ago. I wrote stuff because I was sad and writing is the only thing I could turned to just to feel okay again, it helped me a lot and now I’m in a much better place. Yes, you might think that “you can still write even though you’re not sad anymore” but to be honest sadness fuels my writing, I don’t know why but I write better when I am sad lol.
“Is this the end of Gigantic Thought Bubble?” A big NO, but honestly I won’t be here as much as I was before. I will still write and check in from time to time. I was so anxious to write and post this because I feel like I’m letting go of something that I feel like I shouldn’t, I keep forcing myself to do the things like I did before to the point that I’m pretending to be this person that I am not anymore but I finally accepted that this is part of life— letting go of things. Letting go of who we were (not letting go of writing), we somehow need to move forward because we change, it’s not going to be the same each time because we grow up and we discover new things that will define who we are and we turn to those things to make us feel secure and somehow happy. I always thought that someday I will become this great writer and write/publish my own book, deep down inside of me I wanted that but at this point in my life I think it’s not the time for me but hopefully someday I get to do that.
Gigantic Thought Bubble will continue. See you on my next post.
It’s a rainy day today and I’ve been thinking how relaxing the rain is after so many days in the torturing heat of the summer. I guess this is the start of the rainy season here in the Philippines (yey!) My mind is so calm lately but I’ve also been thinking about getting back to work, we can go back to work on Monday but the problem is there are no public transportation available for the commuters and my family doesn’t want to drive me to work. I should really learn how to drive now but good thing the company I’m working at said that it’s okay if we were still not be able to go to work because of the transportation problem.
Lately I’ve been feeling…
Calm. Being in this quarantine is a piece cake for us introverts. I’ve been wanting to have this kind of break since I started working and it’s sad that it had to be in this kind of way. I feel very relaxed, well I guess I can say too relaxed because I have missed sleeping in and not worrying about how early I have to get up the next day but when you got used to that kind of living you kind of miss it by now.
Lately I’ve been wanting…
To see my friends especially my boyfriend, we hadn’t seen each other since the start of the quarantine which is almost 2 months now. I miss them so much, I miss going out, I miss eating out and I can’t believe I’m saying this but I actually miss going to work lol. I have wanted this kind of break but I guess it’s too much now.
Lately I’ve been doing…
I’ve been playing a lot of video games and mobile games this entire quarantine. I’ve been replaying the story missions of GTA IV & V, I’ve been building houses on Sims 4 and I’ve also been playing Call Of Duty. How productive am I? lol This is also one of the reason that I barely write anymore (sorry). Playing games has been such an effective way to past time or waste time lol either way it somehow lessened the boredom I have been feeling since this quarantine started.
Lately I’ve been hoping…
That this pandemic will be over soon and we could all go back to our normal lives. This pandemic has its upside as well though, we get to spend some time with our family without any excuse or distraction that I hope we will all remember after this. I hope we’ll now value the time we have to know what is truly important.
I used to believe in this saying “It’s not about not caring, it’s about shielding yourself from all the crap— it’s self-preservation.” It’s like I choose to be ignorant to protect my wellness but I think I finally got a hold of myself and handle my personal shit to voice out what I believe in and take a stand.