HIGHLIGHTED WORDS | LOVE LETTERS TO THE DEAD BY AVA DELLAIRA

Welcome to another highlighted words segment where I share with you guys some phrases and words from books that I read and I felt it was relevant and relatable. This blog series also shows my laziness to write a proper book reviews lol (sorry) I should change my blog name to The Lazy Writer is that one taken yet? 🤔

ANYWAYS… 😬

Let these highlighted words from the book speak for the book itself.

Love Letters To The Dead By Ava Dellaira (Novel)

Credits to goodreads

“Sometimes your music sounds like there’s too much inside of you. Maybe even you couldn’t get it all out. Maybe that’s why you died. Like you exploded from the inside.”

“The more you love something, the harder it is to lose.”

“I think it’s like when you lose something so close to you, it’s like losing yourself.

“But life isn’t like that. You can’t be sure how it’s going to come out, even if you do everything right.”

“Music fills up a home. And one day, suddenly the music could escape through a window. For the rest of your life, you had to chase it.”

it feels good to belong somewhere.”

“If beauty is truth, and if truth is beauty, they are defined by each other, so how do we know the meaning of either? I think that we make our own meanings, by putting ourselves into them.”

“Then I just go around and around. And I still don’t know how to make sense of the world. But maybe it’s okay that it’s bigger than what we can hold on to. Because I think that by beauty, you don’t just mean something that’s pretty. You mean something that makes us human.”

“Maybe that’s what being in love is. You just keep filling up, never getting fuller, only brighter.”

“I think a lot of people want to be someone, but we are scared that if we try, we won’t be as good as everyone imagines we could be.”

“You are in awe of something so beautiful, and at the same time, you know that particular sunset will only be there for a moment.”

“I know that it can be hard to believe that someone loves you if you are afraid of being yourself, or if you are not exactly sure who you are. It can be hard to believe that someone won’t leave.”

“When we are in love, we are both completely in danger and completely saved.”

“We were here. Our lives matter.”

“Truth is beautiful, no matter what that truth is. Even if it’s scary or bad. It is beauty simply because it’s true. And truth is bright. Truth makes you more you. I want to be me.”

“I have found that sometimes, moments get stuck in your body. They are there, lodged under your skin like hard seed-stones of wonder or sadness or fear, everything else growing up around them. And if you turn a certain way, if you fall, one of them could get free. It might dissolve in your blood, or it might spring up a whole tree. Sometimes, once one of them gets out, they all start to go.”

“Nirvana means freedom. Freedom from suffering. I guess some people would say that death is just that. So, congratulations on being free, I guess. The rest of us are still here, grappling with all that’s been torn up.”

“After something really bad happens, the next worse thing is people feeling sorry for you about it. It’s like confirmation that something is terribly wrong.”

“It’s sad when everyone knows you, but no one knows you.”

“Do you ever think that for one second you could forget about how it’s supposed to be and just deal with the way it is?”

“Maybe it’s just when you get older, you understand things that you couldn’t before.”

“So maybe when we can say things, when we can write the words, when we can express how it feels, we aren’t so helpless.”


This was actually the last book that I read, and I had a hard time finishing it because I was so caught up with everything that was happening in my life at the time. Work and personal stuff got in the way. So, after 5 months I had finished it (yay). I enjoyed reading this book, there were so many quotes that I totally connected with as you can see from the ‘highlighted words’ above. The book had this great concept by the way, telling stories through writing letters like with Love, Rosie. I always loved that way of writing a book, I know it’s kind of overrated but it’s cute.

Anyways, I hope you liked these highlighted words as much as I did. 😊👋🏼

HIGHLIGHTED WORDS | THE DOGS I HAVE KISSED BY TRISTA MATEER

I have always loved reading books, there was a point in time where that was all I ever did with my free time but then adulting happened and suddenly I didn’t have that free time anymore lol. I have read plenty of books but I never really wrote reviews about them except when I feel a strong connection to it but it’s more of a reaction than a review. So, I went to my goodreads page and saw all the books that I have read in the past and I initially regretted that I didn’t write a reaction/review to it because I was too lazy to write reviews on books. I just feel like a lot of things happen in books and there’s a lot of details unlike in movies, and I am not good with organizing and explaining my thoughts to write concise reviews. But I did highlighted some pages, phrases, sentences, and words that I felt I related to. So, for the next few days I am going to do a blog series where I share some of these highlighted words that I connected to at the time that I read it and for you to also have insights on these featured books.

Let these highlighted words from the book speak for the book itself.

The Dogs I Have Kissed by Trista Mateer (Poetry Book)

“I have been told that girls always fall for men like their fathers,
but I found it a hard concept to grasp when he was always gone.”

“Words like sweetheart and princess make me straighten my back.”

“When I found out that you could cry ‘please no, please don’t, please no, please don’t’ loud enough to wake the neighbors and they still wouldn’t turn on a porch light.
And I never wanted to tell anyone but the poems.”

“Will I ever let this guard down long enough to learn anything new? Fuck no.”

“In this life, you’re going to love like pulling teeth (one after another) and that’s okay.”

“compromising yourself is part of growing up.”

“it’s hard to tell the difference between wanting to die and just wanting to sink for a while.”

“I want to take the messy part of you in like small children, like stray dogs. Kiss them on the mouth, give them a place to stay.”

“Is this okay, is this okay, is this okay, or does it make me weak.”

“I don’t know why I thought the sound of your voice could make up for all the bad things that ever happened to me.”

“I don’t know how to be angry with you, but my pride demands I figure it out. It is so easy to make monsters out of the people I have loved, to pick up a pen and write ‘THIS IS YOUR FAULT’ until the page is full. It is easier to make myself the monster, to snap and bite and run and hide. It is easy to bare my teeth. It is harder to be honest.”

Photo Credits to Google Image

FANGIRL: AN INTROVERT WRITER’S BOOK 

I finished reading the book Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell a few days ago and I don’t often write about the books I read except if I really connected to it and for this book you probably got the idea.

I actually don’t know the main reason why I loved the book, I don’t know if it’s because of the story or because of the way I relate to Cath so much but either way Fangirl is a good read. 

I loved how Cath managed her life and all the stress she went through and also I loved how she stepped out of her comfort zone without actually changing herself. Other people may actually think that the conflict in this book was quite shallow for a fiction but in reality if you’re an introvert every little misalignment on your routine could be a big problem especially when the character was also dealing with anxiety. I enjoyed reading the book even though it never really took me on a  ride like I wanted to but overall I really liked it. This book is all about coping with changes and going out of your comfort zone. So if you struggle with those things might as well read this.

But this book is clearly for the introverts, how the main character Cath loved reading, writing, staying in and how she hated socializing, parties and extrovert stuff. Introverts will probably see their life in this story especially those who are introvert writers. 

This book also showed the essence of writing by how Cath made writing as a daily necessity and it also showed the struggle she had with writing, such as writer’s block, writing the same theme and etc. So you bloggers/writers will totally love this book as well.

More reviews on goodreads.

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ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES

“I should mention that I am a brilliant deflector.”

“I’m waiting for something. I have no idea what.”

“My own brain is to me the most unaccountable of machinery–always buzzing, humming, soaring roaring diving, and then buried in mud.”

“When we’re in the act of wandering, we need to be present, not watching it through a lens.”

“I would have written till it was out of me and on the page.”

“Sorry wastes time. you have to live your life like you’ll never be sorry. It’s easier to just to do the right thing from the start so there’s nothing to apologize for.”

“Headaches are a part of it. It’s like my brain is firing so fast that it can’t keep up with itself. Words. Colors. Sounds. Sometimes everything else fades into the background and all I’m left with is sound.”

“I know life well enough to know you can’t count on things staying around or standing still, no matter how much you want them to. You can’t stop people from dying. You can’t stop them from going away. You can’t stop yourself from going away either. I know myself well enough to know that no one else can keep you awake or keep you from sleeping. That’s all on me too.”

“I’ve learned the hard way that the best thing to do is say nothing about what you’re really thinking. If you say nothing, they’ll assume you’re thinking nothing, only what you let them see.”

“The problem with people is they forget that most of the time it’s the small things that count.”

“Life will get better, and it isn’t only hard times and hard people, that there are bright spots too.”

“What if life could be this way? Only the happy parts, none of the terrible, not even the mildly unpleasant. What if we could just cut out the bad and keep the good? Keep away the bad, so that good is all we ever have around us.”

“‘Lovely’ is a lovely word that should be used more often.”

“In this house there’s no such thing as being sick unless you can measure it with a thermometer under the tongue. Things fall into categories of black and white–bad mood, bad temper, loses control, feels sad, feels blue.”

“Things feel true to us even if they’re not.”

“I’m afraid of me.”

“It’s like I’ve got this angry little person inside me, and I can feel him trying to get out. He’s running out of room because he’s growing bigger and bigger, and so he starts rising up, into my lungs, chest, throat, and I just push him right back down. I don’t want him to come out. I can’t let him out.”

“Jealousy is a mean, unpleasant feeling that only eats you from the inside.”

“Disguise the pain. Don’t call attention. Don’t be noticed.”

“We are all alone, trapped in these bodies and our own minds and whatever company we have in this life is only fleeting and superficial.”

“I am broken. I am a fraud. I am impossible to love.”

“I get into these moods sometimes, and I can’t shake them.–Kind of black, sinking moods. I imagine it’s what being in the eye of a tornado would be like, all calm and blinding at the same time. I hate them.”

“The cadence of suffering has begun. – Cesare Pavese. I am in pieces.”

“Doesn’t anyone care why he comes and goes? Have you ever stopped to think that something might be wrong with this?”

“We do not remember days, we remember moments.”

“Your hope lies in accepting your life as it now lies before you, forever changed. If you can do that, the peace you seek will follow.”

“We can’t always see what others don’t want us to. Especially when they go to great lengths to hide it.”

“No one will even miss me. They won’t know I’m gone. The world will go on, and it won’t matter that I’m not here. Maybe it’s better if I was never here.”

“The thing I realize is that it’s not what you take it’s what you leave.”

 

ALL OF THESE LINES ARE FROM MY NEW FOUND FAVORITE BOOK THAT GOES BY THE NAME “ALL THE BRIGHT PLACES” BY JENNIFER NIVEN. I TOOK NOTES AND THESE LINES ARE THE ONES THAT MADE SENSE TO ME AT THE TIME.(Actually, I might have written the entire book here if I continue).

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I finished this book awhile ago, it’s a fun read I must say but also quite emotional. I love the depth of Theodore Finch’s character. I love how the two main characters really helped each other to hold on to life, I love the way how Finch was very determined to fix himself for Violet and to keep an eye on her, I see Finch as a very heroic character because until the end he still kinda helped Violet to live out her life and to continue her journey. Sadly for Violet he couldn’t save Finch, there is this one line in her letter to Finch after he died that quite struck me, “You saved my life. Why couldn’t I save yours?”.

The thing about this book is that a broken girl meets a suicidal guy, you would think it would be chaos but no they helped each other. Finch helped Violet to move past her fears and go on with her life and Violet unconsciously helped Finch to hold on, Finch found Violet as the reason to stay a little longer until it went really bad for him. Maybe that is life, you just really need a reason and a purpose to stay, you need that Jovian-Plutonian gravitational effect in your life just like how Finch described Violet in his life, “The only person I want to see. My Jovian-Plutonian gravitational effect.”

This book had me forever changed. Read it for yourself. Check out other reviews at goodreads 🙂

I WAS HERE

Is it really much easier to just not exist? Does taking your own life will be the best answer?

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I just finished reading a book about depression and suicide. A novel by Gayle Forman which is entitled I Was Here. The story goes on with Cody who was left by her best friend Meg who committed suicide, she was left with anger, sadness and questions as to why her best friend had ended her life. She goes on investigating and finding answers to her best friend’s death, who made her do it? Not knowing that her best friend was suffering from depression which was the main reason as to why Meg was suicidal as stated by Meg’s parents. By the way Cody described her best friend she sees Meg as a perfect person, Meg has everything, she pretty much had a great life as compared to Cody who was only raised by her mother herself but as she said she was raised by Meg’s parents because most of her life she was with Meg’s family and every good memories she have is with the family of Meg. Cody grew up not knowing her dad and later on found out that her dad is a douche while Meg has a loving mother and father who give everything that she needs. Cody is not rich compare to Meg who got to go to college and Cody was left in their town. Seeing this comparison with the characters I would have understood it more if Cody was the one who ended her life and not Meg. Also in the story, before Cody knew that her best friend suffered from depression she found out that Meg was communicating with people who encourages others to end their life and Cody found this guy who she believes that made Meg kill herself but the guy uses quotes from other people and he never really said that Meg should do it, he did not utter any words that directly said that Meg should kill herself, with this I got the thinking that we all have a choice, no one can force us into doing something that we don’t want to do, so with Meg she wanted it.

Reading this book was quite depressive I must say, I just felt sad after I finished it. But if you want to understand depression more you should read this.

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You can’t really understand depression because people who suffer from this also don’t understand their own emotions, sometimes you don’t even know that they are suffering from it for they wear a mask to hide it, just like Meg who seems to have everything in the world but deep down inside she felt something is missing or something about her life doesn’t seem right. Depression can happen to anyone no matter what their status in life.

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I think at some point in our lives we have gone through the stage where we just want to be gone and not exist, we all have that low point stage in our lives and I think that’s just normal but for those people who suffer from depression I guess it’s quite different for them, it’s like they are living in a world full of sadness and they don’t know how to get out and sometimes it leads to ending their existence which they think is the best answer. To those people who suffer from this illness” even if you can’t see just walk with faith, everything will be alright, don’t kill yourself (literally), just be strong and hang on a little bit longer.

And for everybody else pay close attention to your friends and family sometimes they try to tell you in ways that you won’t easily notice, it’s in the way they walk, the way they look at you, the movie they watch, the songs they listen to, sometimes they joke about it, they might have told you but you did not listen attentively.

*Credits to the photo owners